Well, I made it through my first week back and I survived. It was good to have a sense of normalcy, whatever that is now. I was more tired than I had expected, but I have never been home from work that long either. I got used to getting up and then going back to sleep. I am doing better and better though. I had some weird pain on Friday, and after panicking and calling the doctor and then telling me that it was probably normal, I decided that it was probably my body doing exactly what it should be doing...Getting me ready to have another baby one of these days.
I made it through yet another second of the month and didn't completely break down. It was tougher this month than last though. I think because last month I was so focused on the surgery that I didn't have time to think about much else. Lately I seem to be thinking about the trauma of the situation when I lost Lia Rose. I hope that as time passes that memory gets harder to remember clearly. It isn't something that I really want to remember clearly. As soon as I think that, I try to remember the moment that we held her in her arms and how we fell in love with each tiny part of her.
I will be walking in the March for Babies with the March of Dimes this year. I want to do it to honor Lia Rose, but also for all my other friends who have lost babies. I hope that it can help make a difference somewhere. I am so grateful for those who have been so generous already. It truly is amazing. I am already more than halfway to my goal, albeit wasn't a lofty goal.
The whole on-line fundraising thing is actually pretty nice. It makes it easier and gives people an option to choose without feeling necessarily obligated. I used to hate asking people in person for donations. It is a cause that I really do believe in.