Tough days

Yesterday we went to visit Lia Rose at the cemetery. Every time I am there all I can think of is "this is so unfair, we shouldn't be at the cemetery visiting our baby girl!" It is comforting to be able to go, but it doesn't get any easier. It is and I have a feeling always will be hard. I am so glad that we have someplace to go. We put a palm cross there last week, and my mom and dad put a pink rose there. I miss her so much.

I still get so sad sometimes especially on rainy days, like today. Those are the days that are the most difficult for me. I need the sunshine right now, I need it more than I ever have. I think it is just a sign for me of good things when the sun is out. I try to think of the rain as washing away the bad and the beginning of better things, but it is hard. I just want to be out in the sun.

I am walking in the March for Babies and I am getting excited about it. I am not sure how I am going to do, but John will be there and so will my parents and my brother and a friend from HS. I have raised so much money so far. More than I ever thought that I would. I am truly touched by the generosity of others and how many people have been touched by this. I cry happy tears and it has been a while since that has happened. My brother is going to make t-shirts for us that have the quote"

"At one glance I loved you with a thousand hearts"

-Mihri Hatun

That will be on the back of the shirt...and on the front of the shirt will be in loving memory of Lia Rose January 2, 2009 and her foot print in the actual size...which is tiny, but possibly the cutest little foot print I have ever seen.